Piecing Things Together

Shit. Being that this is my first post ever I am warning this post will be shit. Oh and another warning, I'm not going to puss out like Justin and apologize to people after I rip them apart in my posts, I'm not running for a political office or anything so I will make outlandish and mostly retarded comments all of the time. After the events of last night I feel like I actually have some good topics to talk about. Since Sean, Dan, Mike, and myself all decided that it was a good idea to drink an additional six-pack of beer after we has been drinking at Brownies for an hour, all I have is pieces of the night that I actually remember. Because of this I feel the best format to rehash last night is in a rambling list....

So apparently if I was good at basketball and about 6'7 I too could get into Brownies at 17 years old. Really if I knew these things at like 10 years old I would have spent less time playing Super Techmo Bowl and actually gotten off my lazy ass and shot a basketball. Honestly the basketball recruits that were out last night were like kids in a candy shop, hopefully due to the great looking blondes that they were talking to will help make these kids come here so our program doesn't go into the shitter in 2 years.

Why do parents let drunken Sean talk to their kids? This happened on the cruise and again last night at Coldstone! Do they see a 21 year old dude who is drunken and friendly, and they think "hey lets see what comes out of his mouth!" or "how can I traumatize my kid today" all I know is that even though Sean does nothing but talk to the kids, if in 15-20 years I am the parent in the situation I'll try not to expose kids to people who reek of alcohol.....except for me and my idiot friends of course.

So as if I didn't know this already I am a master of fucking up perfectly good situations. Only I could fuck up a situation where 1) a girl comes up to me and starts conversation.....2) the conversation goes really well.....3) Her friends leave her with me and say "take care of her".......needless to say an hour later nothing came of this proving once again I have all the skills of a 13 year old.

Oh another thing this girl was a sophomore......WTF was I the only one who wasn't notified that it was "underage kiddie night", or were like national "bouncers look the other way" night.

So I basically stumbled home and passed out in 10 seconds with 3 dollars left in my pocket, which was a wrong decision because I missed one of my favorite bi-monthly happenings of of all....the patented and unmatched comedy of "Sean incoherently hollering at Cait." This is one of my favorite things for a multitude of reasons

1) Sean when drunk has NEVER lost an argument, I think if we dug up Johnny Cochran and has him face off with a drunken Sean this would be a matchup for the ages, they both might lose their voices before one loses.

2) Sean although very drunk usually makes good points when he is belligerent, and also things I would never ever say to people. So in other words when he gets in these type of fights im living vicariously through him.

3) A Cait/Sean yelling match always has 4 parts. Firstly Sean starts calling out Cait on certain topics, followed by her trying to throw barbs which end up being more personal and rude, trying to bait Sean. Sean then proceeds to piss Cait off even more by not letting these attacks get to him which leads to her getting physical. Next she will try to bait Sean to even touch her, and if he does, the next day she will claim every bruise on her body is a result of the altercation. Lastly the next day Greg tries to clean up the mess by hanging out with Cait for about 3 straight days, and by pretending to be a little upset with Sean. He is the only real loser in these fights as since he refuses to take a stand on anything in life he ends up annoying both Cait and Sean.

Anyways I'm sure I have offended enough people by now......now time to write the million papers I have due this week. Not having enough stress already in my job search all my profs decided I should have 4894843 projects due at the end of the semester too, just in case I had too much free time during the last 3 truly fun weeks of my life.